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Butterflies in my tummy...

Posted: Thu Mar 24, 2011 10:56 pm
by LivinNandByHim
Hi to everyone! I did it! I have fulfilled my own heart's desire, and I am full of anxiety. One side of me is sure that God has led me to homeschool and to use HOD. The other side of me is scared to death and not sure if I have jumped in to something that I will not be able to feasibly do, or that my husband may not catch my vision; or rather that the good portions of our somewhat differing visions will ever unite to create the the good thing God would like it to become.....
With that said, I want to explain... I work 2 - 3 nights per week / 12 hour shifts as a nurse, and until December at least am taking 2 college classes in order to advance my degree. So, yes, my time is very limited, but my children are 9 and 6 and are able to help with household chores, etc. I THINK that with a routine and a reasonable schedule, I will be able to accomplish the desires of my heart: instilling a Christ / creation centered education and strengthening / maintaining bonds with my children which will enable the guiding and training and openness of their hearts. I believe my son especially is in need of escape (deliverance) from the boredom, lack of individualization, and social stresses he is experiencing at ps. He needs to slow down, be encouraged, and built in the avenues God made him to be. I have studied the catalog and the board for probably a year or more. Originally, I first passed over HOD thinking it "simplistic". However, now I can think of nothing else for me and my family. I posted at one time that I felt quickened by a statement made that "the laborer is worthy of his hire." And I knew and commented at that time that in my heart, I wanted to be able to purchase from HOD, rather than second hand. I also was very careful to acknowledge that we all have to live within our means. So, if I may be forgiven for saying... I was able to piece together my daughter's curriculum : LHFHG, but I was held back in my heart until I could just recently at the Greenville, SC convention, purchase my son's:BHFHG. I left that building nearly giddy with delight believing the Lord had provided the door to purchase mat'ls & sow into this ministry. Since then, however, all my fears and anxieties are upon me. I know that God as He has done all along will give direction, but I had to share. I am so thankful for Julie's sweet and sincere and kind ear and help at the convention. :D

Re: Butterflies in my tummy...

Posted: Fri Mar 25, 2011 3:44 am
by countrymom
It is entirely normal to feel nervous about taking on the education of your children. I think most of us have been there at some point. I too work outside the home and I just want to encourage you that although at times it is not easy, it has been very doable for us. I use a year around schedule to take some of the pressure off and HOD is so open and go. Just a thought, I have found doing the first unit at 1/2 speed to be very beneficial as it helps me fully see what we will be doing, make final decisions on my "system" (card files, notebooks, etc.), and finalize a schedule as I see how the boxes actually work in real life (and get a feel for the time for each). After that I can finalize a schedule and routine and everything just seems to flow. Follow your heart and know we are here to help. I think you will be pleasantly surprised once you get things going.

Re: Butterflies in my tummy...

Posted: Fri Mar 25, 2011 8:28 am
by striving2Bprov31
It is so awesome how God is putting together this plan for your family! It is SO NORMAL to feel nervous/anxious even apprehensive, even though you are inspired and excited. :)

I gathered from your post that you are new to homeschooling?.....if you are, give yourself plenty of time to adjust. Expect to be challenged in a whole new way. Even in the challenge, it is so rewarding and God will strengthen you.

My very very best advice would be to get into your Bible like never before. Get in prayer and praise time with the Lord like never before. That is the number one ingredient to a successful homeschool. If that doesn't come first, I find that all of my good efforts are in vain. Then, ask God to give you a key "mission" scripture if He hasn't already, and hang on to it with all of your might!! The verse God gave me in the very beginning of our journey is, "Faithful is He that calleth you, who also will do it." I lean on the promise in this verse more than I can even say.

Also, it is so helpful to have a few good resources at hand for encouragement on the days when you need an encouraging word. You need something you can just pick up really quick and hear a word from another homeschooling mom. One of my favorites is Julie's book, God's Hand in Life's Little Moments. I've read through it several times. I pick it up when I need to hear that I am not the only one doing this thing called homeschooling! :)

HOD is sounds like the perfect curriculum for your lifestyle! I know that is true for us also. You will find that it will really lift the heavy heavy burden of planning off of your shoulders, and really enable you to focus on other things as you begin your journey.

I hope I haven't come on too strong here, or been preachy! :) These are the things that I wish someone would've told me 3 years ago, so I just thought I would share!! :)

I pray that you will be encouraged, given courage, and given perseverance by the Lord like never before!

Re: Butterflies in my tummy...

Posted: Fri Mar 25, 2011 9:59 am
by LivinNandByHim
Thank you all so much for your replies. I was just trying to pray this morning and telling the Lord, Please don't let me get stuck in the Martha spirit - entangled in the things and the tasks and the checklists, but to be full of the Mary spirit, sitting, eating, drinking, receiving His direction and purpose and love, to be able to be / go where He wants and allow Him to flow in and through us. I do not have any one right now that is backing me up, my husband will not tell me an absolute "NO", but he does not share my vision. He doesn't realize that we share a similar vision, but the paths we are looking at are a little different. God will work on that. But we are not around any other homeschooling families or involved in a support group yet. So, I'm out on an island right now, and your responses were counsel and encouragement that I needed. I am sure of HOD. I am sure I want to homeschool. Everything else is shaky ground, but I am holding on to the Lord, Abraham was told to move out and go, not knowing where exactly he was going.... I pray that we all find the faith and relationship with our Lord that keeps us moving in the direction God reveals to us day by day.

Re: Butterflies in my tummy...

Posted: Fri Mar 25, 2011 12:47 pm
by 3sweeties
Hi LivinNandByHim!

I just wanted to welcome you to HOD and homeschooling!!! :D :D I remember feeling the same way when we first started 4 years ago! It was like running and jumping off a cliff, but still trusting that the Lord would be there to catch me! Yes, there are hard days...discouraging days...days when I'm not sure I can do this anymore, but then I remember what God has called me to do and I KNOW I am doing what HE wants me to and that is all that matters. Nothing else brings me the Peace--not a successful routine, knowing the kids are learning, organization, etc.--that following His Plan for our family does! I say all of this to encourage you and tell you that I am absolutely confident that He will give you the strength, grace, and ALL that you need as you embrace this wonderful lifestyle called homeschooling--He has for me time and time again!!! :D Praying that you will sense His Peace today!!!

In Christ,

Re: Butterflies in my tummy...

Posted: Fri Mar 25, 2011 4:07 pm
by Heather4Him
Hi and welcome to HOD and homeschooling!! :)

It sounds like you really have the right heart attitude and are following the Lord's leading in this adventure. He will continue to lead and guide (and bless abundantly) you as you follow Him wholeheartedly.

Re: Butterflies in my tummy...

Posted: Fri Mar 25, 2011 5:50 pm
by Mercy
Here I stand...I have been homeschooling since my 11yo first started school. Who would have thought? Lol! And you know what...All of those doubts, questions, fears...they all disappear as you just keep moving forward. I have a friend who is just starting on her homeschool journey and it just reminded me of all the battles you face when you first begin. Take comfort that we have all been there! we have traveled the road before you. :D You can do it! I also encourage you, as others have, to take time on your knees for when the waves of doubt hit. Ask our Father to give you a special Word to hang onto when things get rocky. As I said, those battles I once had...whether I could actually do this, what about...high school, socialization...all of the "what if's" are gone and confidence has been put in the place of fear and doubt. All glory goes to the Lord Most High for His very help in those times of need!!

Enjoy the road. It goes way too quick!
In love and grace,
Mercy

Re: Butterflies in my tummy...

Posted: Fri Mar 25, 2011 6:29 pm
by Daph
Welcome to homeschooling! :D It's completely normal to feel that way when you first begin. We've been doing it for four years, if you count Preschool, and ever now and then, I still feel that way. But I would change a single thing. To be able to spend so much quality time with your family and really get to know your children is such a blessing. I honestly love hanging out with my kids; they're great little people. :) And all the funny, cute, outrageous things that they say and do, I wouldn't give to anyone else for all the money in the world! They make me a better person.

I hope you enjoy your first year of homeschooling! It's such a great adventure. And I wish I'd found HOD in the beginning of mine. :) From what I've read in the guide, it's going to be a lot of fun, and that's one of the greatest things about homeschool: you can make learning FUN!

Re: Butterflies in my tummy...

Posted: Sun Mar 27, 2011 7:04 pm
by Carrie
LivinNandbyHim,

The Lord will equip you for the task to which He has called you! :D Be encouraged that in our weakness, He is made strong. :wink: The journey is not always easy, but it is very rewarding. The further I travel the more I see the fruit of the homeschooling lifestyle. I pray the Lord will be near to you as you begin. We will be here to journey with you and encourage you as you travel the HOD path! :D

Blessings,
Carrie

Re: Butterflies in my tummy...

Posted: Sun Mar 27, 2011 7:59 pm
by LivinNandByHim
Thank you, Carrie, for creating a personal and individualized environment. This board is a great resource and it is wonderful how supportive you all are. I have spoken with Mr. Austin a few times on the phone. I have met Carrie and Julie both, two separate times. Inspiring and sweet folks! :D

Re: Butterflies in my tummy...

Posted: Mon Mar 28, 2011 8:37 pm
by my3sons
This is a new and exciting chapter in your life, and the good news is the Lord is writing it! :D Imagine how pleased He must be with your decision to homeschool with as Christ-centered of a curriculum as HOD?!? I'm so glad we had the chance to meet and talk at the convention. :D I really do understand the deep desire you are feeling for your dh to be on the same page as you. With prayer, patience, and time, I do believe those dear husbands of ours can often be won over. :wink: With my dh, after years of seeing happy healthy dc showing themselves capable well-adjusted students, he has slowly come around to fully embracing homeschooling. With God, nothing is ever impossible! I can't wait for you to start!

In Christ,
Julie