What was YOUR school experience?

[Erin]

My husband asked me tonight what the people who are homeschooling their children, what THEIR OWN school experience was. And I have heard a zillion stories on why people are homeschooling their children, most are that of our own, but I never once heard what peoples experiences were when THEY were in school. Does anyone mind sharing? Whether public/private, doesn't matter. Just if you liked or disliked it and if your experience was a contributing factor on homeschooling your child/ren. Thanks so much!!

[Kelly]

I'm new around here, but I'll chime in!
I went to public schol K-12, made mostly A's, was on honor roll, etc.
When I became an adult I discovered that although I made such great grades in school I really was not "educated" the way I thought I was.
Oh, I passed tests with 100% most of the time, and then promptly forgot everything. I did well because I had such a good memory. My motivation was simply good grades, not learning. Now I having to relearn pretty much everything.
I do not want my kid to have this kind of school experience. It is not the #1 reason for homeschooling, but it is one reason. We may not cover everything the the school system does, but I hope what we do learn is meaningful and will be retained. I think a lot of time is wasted in regular school because of the temporary learning/test/forget mentality.
That is just my 2 cents!!!
I am happy to get the chance to learn along with my kids now.

Kelly

mom to ds-7
dd-6
ds-3

[annaz]

So-so....elementary school was christian through 6th grade. Then I got a whopping culture shock in 7th & 8th grade! I liked elementary school, I hated, hated, 7th and 8th grade.

High school was less than pleasing with all the clicks and such. While I was on Prom court, I wasn't much noticed until I made the Pom Pom squad in Jr year, hence prom court. I was one of those unnoticed types...not popular, not nerdy, just rather non-existant. But I hated High School and what went on there. I hated that people were tagged. I hated that some kids were mean just to be so. I took the early graduation in my Jr year because I had enough credits and came back for graduation the following year. I missed nothing.

I thought it was awful that you only got to go to dances if you were asked by boys. So some of us didn't get to go, ever. After prom I figured I missed nothing there either. Academics I feel were only adequate. Some subjects I got, some I didn't.

I homeschool for academic reasons; to move at my dd's pace, not some government pace, to do school at a daily time that works for us, to expand where we want, to get extra help where needed and for religious instruction, to vacation when we want, among a gazillion other reasons.

[netpea]

I was in a small town, where I graduated with 74 other kids. I was my class valedictorian, and I hope I never send my dc to public school. I saw alcohol and drug use in school, there were the cliques and bullies. I had zero friends my senior year, they all abandoned me because as class valedictorian, I was UNcool, so they were uncool by association. I went to my senior prom alone. I never dated anyone from my own school, noone ever asked. I was considered a "goody two shoes" and "brain". I rebelled my reputation senior year and started ditching school and doing undesirable things. I got away with alot that year.

I tried so hard to fit in that I failed a test on purpose. My biology teacher made me stay after school and retake it because he figured me out.

I got to college without the benefit of a 5 year math program or AP classes (never even heard of those before college). I was continually insulted by my freshman calculus professor. "This is baby math, if you can't do this, you can't be an engineer". I may have been the valedictorian, but I was woefully unprepared for freshman year of college.

I don't want any of that for my children. But my primary goal is to bring them up in knowlege of Christ and in God's hand in all of life, not just the part of life that goes to church on Sunday.

sorry, I think I'm rambling.

[my3sons]

What a wonderful topic! I think you will get so many different answers here, which is what makes homeschooling the wonderful option that it is! Here's my story...

I went to public school in a small town. My graduating class had about 60 students in it. I did well in school and always got good grades. I realized in middle school that there were popular girls, and I was not one of them. About this time, my mom went to work as a teacher (she'd been a stay-at-home mom before), and my dad stopped farming. We moved to town, and they both started new jobs. Both of my sisters moved away, one to get married, and one to go to college. I was very lonely, but I always went to church, and my parents were wonderful Christians - very loving and caring.

In high school, I got my braces off and contacts, and suddenly I guess I looked better and became "popular". I kind of felt like I had to live 2 lives, the one at school and the one at church. I was in about every activity I could be in, and with only 60 students in my class, I was able to excel at most of them (not too hard to start in sports are be the lead in musicals when there are not many students)! By the time I graduated, I was a mess. I had an older boyfriend, and I was on the homecoming court and had other "honors", but I didn't fit in anywhere. I missed the closeness we'd had before as a family when my sisters were home, and I caved in under peer pressure to fit in by not being a strong Christian anymore. I was one way at church in my dad's Sunday school class, and another way at school. College was more of the same, until I moved home and met my husband.

I got my teaching degree, and my master's degree. I had taught 7 years in elementary school. My oldest sister was already homeschooling, and my middle sister was going to start. I still wasn't going to, and my dh wasn't supportive at that point. After my first child was born, I was teaching one day (he was in daycare), and I realized that I would not even want my ds to be in my own class. That was a big revelation for me! Before that, I thought I'd just handpick the best teachers, have him be in my class too, or teach part-time and volunteer a lot in the classroom. Then it hit me that it was school in general that had down-spiraled (I could really go on and on here, but I don't want to be that negative). I realized I wanted to be my ds's teacher, and that the only way to do that was to homeschool. The rest is a very long story, but let me say that to sum it up... I was a good girl growing up, until peer pressure and loneliness got the best of me. I still looked like I had it all together, but I didn't, and I was very sad inside.

I am homeschooling because I want my children to know God and to be able to talk about faith in a natural way that is not something separate to do at church. I also am homeschooling because so much time is wasted in public school. I can teach at home in so much less time, so much better in a small group setting, and the dc still have time to play, spend time with siblings, and explore whatever they're interested in personally. If my dh wants to take my sons fishing, he can call at noon and be on the river with them by 2PM any day of the week. In other words, we run our own schedule, and I love it!

Sorry that got long! I'll enjoy reading other moms' posts! What a good question to ask, Erin! And if I may ask you and your husband, what are you thinking about homeschooling at this point? Is it something you are considering or already doing, etc.? I know the wonderful ladies on this board would answer other questions you may have as well. We all believe in homeschooling, or we wouldn't be doing it! However we can be of further assistance, just let us know!

In Christ,
Julie

[Tansy]

lets see
Kindergarden I was a misfit toy too hyper for any teacher.
First grade-2nd did well in art. Bully beat me up every other day her name was Heidi. Mom asked school to stop it but since it happened 3 feet from school property they refused her parents were getting a divorce and we have to make allowances for her. Mom made a deal with the "nasty old lady" on the corner (she was actually quite nice, but never let us kids cut though her yard) I could cut though her yard no questions asked. She beat the rest off with a broom.
3rd grade I followed my teacher around with my spelling test telling her I had all the letters to the words how could I have gotten all of them wrong? was reading (due to my dads teaching me at a) 5th grade lvl but was kept in 2nd grade reading because "I was To stupid to spell" or so that is what the teacher told me. So school was boring or very hard.
Had one friend outside of school who ditched me during school cause of Heidi..
4th and 5th grades I spend most of my time sitting outside in the hall in contests with the boys to see who could make the most gross noise. I actually had to prove to my gym teacher I really could do 67 sit ups in 60 seconds. i was that poor of a student. In 4th grade we had a long term subsitute Mrs Black Who I adored she let us play at our desks if we did our work correctly (my grades improved dramaticaly) My 5th grade teacher accused me of cheating since I had been failing math up till we got to fractions. Since I could see fractions as objects I excelled. Mom really did a great job advocating for me.

6th grade we moved I was in heaven a new start no Heidi!
Dad in first 6 months as vice prinicpal put half the high school on in-school suspention (120 students), got rid of the massive drug problem too). But now I had 3 friends (we were all misfits together). One day (3am) I woke up and heard noises, outside my window, turned on light and scared the kids away that were putting graffeti all over our house. Did u know eggs and oil paint make a black stain you can't paint over? And I couldn't understand why people didn't know were are spanish and not from Mexico... but I'm really mostly polish...

One of my dads teachers told his class to call all of my fathers children "chico" so that was my nickname till in 9th grade when "ugly" took over.
In 7th grade due to the pushyness of my 6th grade teacher (poor woman i was not a loveable student). I was tested. you see my 6th grade teacher caught me speed reading pride and prejudice... during detention... and understanding it. Since I was in 4th grade reading due to my spelling. She thought something was very very wrong. is it any wonder I hated school?
So in 7th grade I was finally diagnosed with Dyslexia, short term memory loss, and a weird eye movement that pulls words from other sentences into what ever sentence I am reading. but I placed so high on the IQ test they could not list me a Learning Disabled. Go figure.

High School was a weird I was close to my Dad so I was a goody 2 shoes. Was labeled as a "nark" cause I told a teacher on my freshman year art field trip the older kids had gone back to the bus with a pipe and smoking isn't allowed on the bus. How was I to know they were getting high! So Icontinued having only my 3 misfit friends. Didn't date anyone from my high school Dad chased them all off. but imported my dates they were all quite handsome. But since we finally knew what my problems were and that it wasn't beacuse I was Stupid, I made deans list my Jr and Sr year. I also started winning races in track and "the jocks" were forced to accept me.

I went off to college And too my surprize was asked out on 10 dates my first week there, and won 2nd place in the freshman beauty contest ( I entered to get a laugh).
I was finally popular! but I never let it go to my head. tho I must admit God got some good revenge for me. One day, one kid from my old High school showed up on my campus. We were on the 3rd floor of a very busy building. He started taunting me like we were in High school again. 4 TEP boys I knew were there and I was dating a TEP boy at the time. They came over to me and asked "Is this punk bothering you? " I said so sweetly " Yes he is but please don't kill him. Just get rid of him." I saw them carry him down 3 flights of stairs and toss him out of the building... Next time I saw him was when I was checking his books out of the library. He was very respectful to me. I always wondered what those TEP boys said...

So I'm homeschooling! Public School is a dangerous place.

[Treewin]

I will tell you my experience breifly and as positively as I can.

Where I lived there was required early entrance into Kindergarten. So I started Kindergarten at 4 years 4 months old. It was an experimental program that was not successful school wide (thus my unschooling bent for early grades). They hired a Social Worker to help correct the worst cases.

My brother, who was almost the top of his class, had ulcers or stomach problems by 3rd grade from the stress. I was a very kinestic learner and was disagnosed as a hyperactive child by 1st grade. (I still am kinestic as an adult. It has taken me awhile to discover that this is the way God made me and I cannot question His wisdom.) My family was flagged as a family to start "holding back". So I did grade 2, grade 2-3 and grade 3 (my brother did a similar thing).

Well we moved after 4th grade. The new school was a small town school of 400 kids at most. My sixth grade teacher had a nervous break down in March so we had temps for the rest of the year. My 8th grade teacher use to taunt me from the front of the room using my own name. An abuse which would not be tolerated now (and he was the vice principal!). He told my parents that I should be enrolled in the easier high school program because in his words, I "would only end up schlepping donuts on the night shift anyway so why bother trying."

Off to high shcool, learning was drudgery and I did bare minimum. I still got about a 70% average. I was truly bored with my options with the exception of Sociology. That one facinated me.

Off to University, I aced out in a truly liberal arts program. Meaning I had courses from all fields of study. So I took Biology Stats, Social Work, English, Economics Etc Etc. I passed with honors and held down a part time job to pay for it. Not sounding like a loser now am I.

Well I went on to get a Post Graduate learning experience at a local hospital working with children on the Children's Ward. My specialty was children with Psychatiric disorders. I have been learning ever since.

I married a Professor of biology, who was one of my closest friends in high school, and had three wonderful kids. So when the time came to enroll my first bright, bold and emotional little girl whom I had raised carefully the first five years, I could not. The city I live in started all day Kindergarten that year and I could not in good conscious submit my child to an experiment.

There are other reasons why I choose to homeschool but that was the driving force and the rest are just extra supporting ones.

My husband on the other hand, had a wonderful experience in school and was successful all through out (he moved ahead one year and would have done a second had his parents not said no). He still supports us homeschooling and has taken to teaching Dd math at night.

So that is our story Erin. One thing I like about your question is that it brings to light how different each persons path in life is. We all homeschool alittle different for different reasons and different types of kids. God is so awesome. He can meet us where we each are and use our uniquness to glorify Himself.

I hope that as you and your hubby think these decisions through that you will find the plan God has for your family! I am sure you will find support here. For the few weeks I have been here I have found people to be very kind and loving. These ladies are so wise too!!

[blessedmomof4]

I did not attend K, because my mother taught me to read, write, and do basic math (long before homeschooling became "popular"-I don't even know if it was a word then!) Her mentality was, I should be prepared with the basics before starting formal school. The local public school vice principal wanted to insist on putting me in K and Bilingual ed, just because my parents are from Puerto Rico, so she assumed my English was poor. However, my mother grew up in NYC, and at the time, I barely spoke Spanish! My mom fought that, and demanded they test me-so they gave me a book to read aloud, which was surely beyond K or even 1st, and I read it perfectly. They had no choice but to admit me into 1st, in the regular classes. After a while, the teacher recommended I be placed in the advanced class, because I was getting bored!
By the end of 2nd grade, I told my mother I did not like the school. There were a lot of bad things going on-one boy kicked me in the stomach over a place in line, and another was "flashing" girls under the lunch table
So, my mother withdrew me and sent me to parochial school for 3rd. After a year there, the teachers and administration decided to skip me a grade, because I learned so quickly.
After 8th, I attended a specialized public high school with an emphasis in science, because my teachers kind of pushed for it since I always had A's-there was an entrance exam to get in, for which many students studied, but I did not-I just took it and passed. But I didn't do well in the school, because it was a very competitive environment, and I felt lost in the shuffle. I actually spent my junior year avoiding all classes except the high school chorus, because the pressure was so great.
I still managed to graduate thanks to summer school, but my GPA was of course low for having so many F's due to absences. My SAT scores were good, so I still got into a 4 year college. However, despite a freshman year on the honor roll, I burned myself out by 3rd year, because I took so many classes it was ridiculous-I had a double major (English and Music Performance) plus honors classes plus a minor (Sociology). So, I stopped going to school, fell in love and got married, and had my 1st child.
I saw a lot of me in him, and knew some homeschooling parents at church. I was always taken by the fact their children were different-in a good way-polite respectful, sociable, bright, and joyful. My MIL also heard of homeschooling and noticed how bright her grandson was-he was teaching himself to read at 3 and a half, and she said, "Why fix what isn't broken-if he's already learning at home, why don't you make it official?"
And that is how I came to homeschool my children, and am very happy I did.

[Kelly]

I am really enjoying reading these posts. Sad to read about the bad experiences, but further confirms our choice to homeschool. I am sure there are some people out there who have had a decent school experience, but they definately seems to be the exception.
Oh, and did I mention someone was shot at my highschool? While I was there? In the hallway? (not fatally, thank God.)
My parents question homeschooling , and I always come back with " I know it seems weird to you and you don't understand, but at least you can rest knowing you won't learn about them being shot in a school shooting or raped in a bathroom."(which happened down the road from me here.) They concede the point.

[crlacey]

I'm new around here, but I'll chime in!
I went to public schol K-12, made mostly A's, was on honor roll, etc.
When I became an adult I discovered that although I made such great grades in school I really was not "educated" the way I thought I was.
Oh, I passed tests with 100% most of the time, and then promptly forgot everything. I did well because I had such a good memory. My motivation was simply good grades, not learning. Now I having to relearn pretty much everything.
I do not want my kid to have this kind of school experience. It is not the #1 reason for homeschooling, but it is one reason. We may not cover everything the the school system does, but I hope what we do learn is meaningful and will be retained. I think a lot of time is wasted in regular school because of the temporary learning/test/forget mentality.
That is just my 2 cents!!!
I am happy to get the chance to learn along with my kids now.

Kelly

This is pretty much my story too. I went to a small private school for K and 1st grade, then to public school for the rest. Not only was I bored in school. Turns out all those A's didn't matter when you forget everything after a test. There are times I'm just plain embarrassed by my lack of knowledge.

[inHistiming]

Well, my school experience was okay, but not great. I went to public school from K-12. The elementary school probably had less than 250 students from K-8th grade. I remember one teacher, who had also taught my brother, asking, "Why can't you be like your brother?" He was an excellent writer, and apparently she was not impressed by my attempts. I also remember much emphasis being placed (by the students) on boys and girls and who you were "going" with. We were so young, that should not have been a concern. By 8th grade many of the girls had already 'gone all the way' and one was pregnant. We partied, drinking alcohol supplied by one of my friend's parents. When I began High School, with the same friends, this behavior just continued. However, I met my hubby in the 10th grade. Unfortunatel,my bad behavior continued, and I made lots of mistakes. He was "the one" and I knew this, but I had a long way to go before I changed my life. We graduated with a class of about 285. During the two years after graduation my life spiraled down pretty far. My (future) husband went off to college, and I attended a Jr. college close to home. It was more of the same. My DH (future) was not happy with me and finally said, "I will not have a wife with a bottle in one hand and a baby in the other!" Those were some harsh words, and I think it's what it took to get me on the right path. I decided I needed to change if I wanted to be with the love of my life. We married in 1995, two years after graduation. We've had many ups and downs, but God has been there the whole way. It's been a long process, but here are some of the reasons I am homeschooling:

-God was calling me to do this.
-I can teach them more each day than they would learn in public school.
-They will not have to remember negative comments made by teachers that last a lifetime.
-My husband and I are their major influence, not some other adult(s).
-My daughter needed one-on-one reading help and has excelled with it.
-They probably will not experience the peer pressure to drink and have sex at such a young age; and if they do they will know how to handle it.
-I can teach them God's word throughout the day, and help them understand that God calls us to be different, set apart, not to fit in and cave in to peer pressure.
-I don' want my kids to turn to anything else for their worth.

I did not understand how valuable I am, and was, to God. I want my kids to grow up with that knowledge. My hope is, that when they do get in the world and I'm not there, they will have a confidence in Jesus Christ about who they are and what is important. I pray they will have no desire to get drunk, or have sex with anyone until they are married to the one God has for them. I know that each of us is responsible for our own choices; I am certainly responsible for mine and still have some consequences due to poor choices. I don't feel, however, that I had the best foundation. That's what I want for my kids and HS'ing is the best way I know to build it; a foundation of Jesus Christ.

[joyfulheart]

Public School - First grade teacher beat me daily, threatened to kill me if I told my parents. My mother found out from another kid telling her.
The school wouldn't let her pull me out (this was the 70's).

Stayed in pubilc school. Had nasty horrible teachers. I hated learning.
I hated school. Had 0 self esteem.

7-9th grades. Private school. Great teachers. Best friend (16 years old) ran away with pastor of the private school to florida. (He was married with kids in my class, also 16 years old). Other friends getting high and pregnant in church steeple on daily basis. School got on cover of Dallas magazine, finally convinced parents to pull me out.

10-12th grade, public high school. Easy, too easy. Straight A's, never opened a book once. Crappy school. LOL Teachers didn't care, but neither did I.

College. No skills, not prepared.

[6timeboymom]

Tansy-I just want to hug you right now!!! ((((TANSY))))
my school experience was similar in that I am no where near the person I was then.
I was in a small rural school (40 kids in my class-and that included two foreign exchange students! lol!) I was a country kid (my parent's are farmers) and so I couldn't do any of the after school stuff, I had to come home on the bus, and couldn't go back to town because everyone was too busy to take me. I was made fun of, I was not popular but I was smart but I learned to take the easy courses (home ec and art, anyone??) so that I wouldn't be at the top of the class and have anyone notice me again, or I'd be made fun of even more. I learned that I was worthless, and had nothing to contribute, and even though I was Christian and went to church every week God thought it was great fun to make my life miserable. I figured if I wasn't worth much I might as well engage in as many self-destructive behaviors as possible, so I did. At least I didn't get arrested, that's all I'm going to say about THAT time in my life!
Then I met Lester, got married, and started having children. I put Jake in school-after all, that's what you do, isn't it?? Only the really cuckoo religious nut jobs "homeschool" right?? (said with my tounge firmly in my cheek! I'm one of "them" now! )
When I saw him as a kindergartener get picked on by fourth graders and nothing was done I realized that he would have my experience. Then when the teacher (God bless her-she's not the problem, the system is!) in first grade told him to stop reading his chapter books because it made the kids who couldn't read "feel bad" I knew we had to make some big decisions!
Now I see that God was not only crying with me in the hard times, but holding me up so I could be the strong person I am today who can stand up and advocate for myself, my children, and others. He refined me in the only way I seem to be able to learn-through experience and difficulties. I saw that my job was to raise any children he blessed me with in HIS way, not the world's way. I saw that as much as I love my boys, He loves them and I more then I can fathom, and He entrusted them to me! That means I am held to a much, much higher standard then their grade level in math or reading!
That's one reason I don't have any contact with anyone I graduated with, and why I couldn't ever live "back home" I mean, I'm only 90 miles away, but it's just far enough that I can be who I am without being reminded of who I used to be.


*phew* that was cathartic!! I don't know if I've ever put that into words before!

[Tansy]

awe it was ok once we moved our house backed up to state property, I used to go and sit in a field trying to sit so still the rabbits would come to me. (they never did) I also had a strong faith in the Lord.. that which doesn't kill you makes you stronger. But thanks for the Hug I appreciate it!

[Kathleen]

This was agreat idea Erin!  Thanks everyone for sharing!  Your stories make me want to give hugs all around.

I grew up in a very small town in NE Iowa (about 600 people in the town!)  I went to public school there through elementary.  My family moved when I was in jr. high to a slightly bigger town in SW Iowa (about 6000 people in the town).  I loved school K-6 and had wonderful teachers!  (Some of them taught my mom when she was in school!)  They were wonderful and many of them godly, which I know is rare.

In fact, I saw my Kindergarten teacher last fall at my mom's funeral, and she was right there to give me a hug.  She still teaches Kindergarten and gives hugs to the kids every day.

Jr. High and High School weren't that great, but mostly just because I wasn't popular and didn't drink, party, or sleep around.  I'd say my experience was a lot like Kelly's.  I was a straight A student, but don't remember as much as I should.  The emphasis wasn't on learning, but on testing. 

I felt a lot of pressure in high school about what career I was headed for.  Since I was bright (I scored a 34 on my ACT), it was assumed that I was going to do something amazing (not be a stay-at-home mom).I am so thankful that God put our family in a church with a lot of teens many of whom were living for the Lord.  It helped me see what was important.  I wanted to do what God wanted me to!

Sorry this is long...He led me to Bible College where I majored in education, fully planning on being a wife and mother.  Our main reason for hsing is that my dh and I want to raise our kids.  We want to see them and be there for them! This is something I was lacking growing up and my husband had (he was homeschooled by his parents who he farms with).

I subbed in the public schools in our town before my 1st ds was born...scary! We knew that wasn't an option for our precious kids. We actually sent our ds to a small Christian school for K and 1st. K was only Mon, Wed, Fri which was ok, but 1st was every day and we did not see him enough. (We were already planning to hs, but for those 2 years, we had different circumstances...) Anyway, we love homeschooling, and so do our kids!