What a difference a week makes!

This is where new posts begin. All questions or discussions about any of Heart of Dakota's curriculums start here. If you wish to share a one-time post about your family's experience with our curriculum, you may post under the specific curriculum title (found beneath this "Main Board" heading).
Post Reply
LynnH
Posts: 1846
Joined: Sun Jan 25, 2009 12:41 pm
Location: OH
Contact:

What a difference a week makes!

Post by LynnH » Thu Aug 28, 2014 1:53 pm

If any of you read my blog last week, which was our first week of the World Geography guide, then you know it was kind of a rough week. I will admit that I found myself in tears and really wondering if my ds was going to be up to the challenge of doing HOD for high school. My dh and I had long discussions and God and I had even longer discussions. God led me to something that really spoke to me. There was a Focus on the Family podcasts where the authors of a book called "No More Perfect Kids" were speaking. They said 3 things that pierced me right to my heart. The first was that we need to parent the child that God gave us and not the child we wished we had. Another thing was that we should expect excellence from our children not perfection. They said that for some children excellence is an 80% and for others it is a 99% on a test. If a child does his best and truly works towards his excellence then we should be very pleased with that. They also said that when a child is learning to walk and they take 2 steps and fall down that we still cheer. They asked why is it when our older children take 2 or 3 steps and fall down we are disappointed. I realized that I had been comparing my ds to the other kids who are are doing his level of HOD. I look at week in reviews or read threads here and it seems they are way ahead of where he is. That isn't fair to him and it isn't at all what God wants me to do. I realized I needed to rejoice in the progress he is making and keep in mind that it is a process and he is the way he is for a reason and take joy in who he is.

So this week I went in with an entirely different attitude. I did tell my ds about expecting him to do his best work whatever that might look like. I also made sure he knew that if he struggled with something that was ok we would work through it together. He took it to heart and this week has been soooo much better. He is getting into a groove with many of the independent boxes and he is working towards his version of excellence in almost every subject. I also had to remind myself that the just because a box is supposed to be Independent doesn't mean it will be that way at the beginning of the guide. So I am teaching and helping him to draw out information from the readings as needed. Literature is the subject that requires the most help, but even with that he is making progress.

I just thought I would share this in case anyone else has a less than stellar start with a new guide or someone who has a child that isn't the infamous "gifted homeschooled child". Just hang in there, spend lots of time in prayer, and enjoy your dc the way God made them and it truly will help everyone's attitude and school experience. Oh and just because it's highschool doesn't mean it can't be fun. We have had quite a few smiles and laughs the last few days, now that I have loosened up some.
Mom to:
dd 22 college graduate and employed as an Intervention Specialist
ds 18 US2, Loved Preparing, CTC , RTR , Rev to Rev, MTMM ,WG, WH and US1
http://www.graceandfur.blogspot.com/

MelInKansas
Posts: 1700
Joined: Thu Apr 15, 2010 7:32 pm

Re: What a difference a week makes!

Post by MelInKansas » Thu Aug 28, 2014 2:28 pm

Thanks for sharing what God has shown you this week, as there are many of us who can be encouraged by it. I'm so glad this week has been better, with adjusted expectations. Expectations are such a big part of it!

A somewhat similar story, when I was told about 2 weeks ago that my son had to wear an eyepatch for at least 2 hours a day, and she expected I would have to spend at least 30-40 minutes of that time actively playing with him and making sure he was doing OK, I thought to myself "30-40 minutes? I don't have time for that!" Shame on me. I don't have 30-40 minutes to help my youngest with something that is important to his health and vision? That is absurd. Yes I have time. It just meant adjusting my goals in other areas. And even WITH that we've been able to get school done (though I will admit there have been some cartoons in the process). And my son's attitude about his eyepatch changed dramatically between day 1 and day 2. He's a little trooper.

Prayers things continue to look up and your son is encouraged and inspired to put his best into his work every day, which I'm sure will encourage you as well.
Melissa
"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases
His mercies never come to an end"

DD12 - Rev to Rev + DITHOR 6/7/8
DD10 - CTC + DITHOR 2/3
DD7 - Bigger + ERs
DS5 - LHFHG
DD2 - ABC123
2 babies in heaven

Nealewill
Posts: 1611
Joined: Sat Sep 14, 2013 5:08 pm
Location: Cincinnati, OH

Re: What a difference a week makes!

Post by Nealewill » Thu Aug 28, 2014 3:28 pm

Yes, thank you for sharing.

Every year I feel like I have to go through this mantra myself :-) Everyone of my children thrives in different areas. Even today, my son is doing math and he sitting there crying (no - math wasn't too long nor was dragging anything on - that is just his way of dealing with frustration) and saying I don't get it. After about 10 minutes, we just stopped. It's okay. We'll pick it up tomorrow. But I was thinking - you know? When he gets it, he will get it! But he just doesn't get it.....yet :-)

And with my oldest, I had to set up a schedule to spread my week over 5 days instead of 4. The first 3 weeks were a little rough. But then today, she finished her day in 3.5 hours????? Okay - cool! Maybe we will be jumping to 4 days very soon :-)

But yes - it is interesting how you can never compare kids either :-) I am just thankful that HOD is a good fit for all of mine :-) Each one thrives in different areas but over all, it is a GOOD fit for each in many areas. But I am glad they get challenged in a few too.

So glad your 2nd week went much better. I know for each of my kids, every year there is a new level, they just need a little bit of help to get into the groove. And usually by the time my panic is subsided, they are finally heading into it :-)
Daneale

DD 13 WG
DS 12 R2R
DD 10 R2R

Enjoyed DITHOR, Little Hearts, Beyond, Bigger, Preparing, CTC, R2R, RevtoRev, MtMM

momtofive
Posts: 295
Joined: Wed Apr 11, 2012 7:26 pm

Re: What a difference a week makes!

Post by momtofive » Thu Aug 28, 2014 5:34 pm

Lynn, I just want to say thank you for sharing what God has laid on your heart! I needed to hear it today too!! ;)
Lisa ~ Gal. 2:20, Prov. 3:5-6
Mom to five great blessings :)
Ds23 - Graduated from HOD!
Ds21 - Graduated from HOD!
Dd19 - Graduated from HOD!
Dd17 - US History 2
Dd16 - World History

Loving HOD since 2010!

jenn in nc
Posts: 165
Joined: Fri Jul 31, 2009 9:36 am

Re: What a difference a week makes!

Post by jenn in nc » Thu Aug 28, 2014 9:28 pm

Wow, Lynn, I loved reading this. So very encouraging -- brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for the peek into what God is teaching you. We are starting World Geography in a couple of days with my 10th grade boy who, like your son, struggles in many ways but works hard and learns so much. I'll be a couple of weeks behind you!

Jenn
Jenn, mom to 10

queenireneof3
Posts: 173
Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2013 10:44 am

Re: What a difference a week makes!

Post by queenireneof3 » Sat Aug 30, 2014 1:59 pm

Thank you for sharing! Such a great reminder. I especially love the image of cheering for our kids even when they only take 2 or 3 steps. My kids just glow when I praise them for what they are doing well and have a much harder time when I am down on them for something I think they should be better at. I am glad to be reminded of this before we start our new guide.
Sara Irene
wife to Brett for 16 years already!
mommy of ds B (13yo), dd S (11yo), ds S (7yo), dd (3 yo), dd (1.5yo), and two who went to meet Jesus 3/5/2014 and 7/23/14

Samuel'sMommy
Posts: 647
Joined: Thu Jun 05, 2008 1:59 pm
Location: TN
Contact:

Re: What a difference a week makes!

Post by Samuel'sMommy » Sat Aug 30, 2014 3:04 pm

Thanks for sharing! Such a great reminder for all of us as moms!
Stephanie
Wife to Adam for 25 years
Mom to Samuel (18 - freshman in college), Isaiah (8), and Judah (4) through the miracle of adoption
Using and loving LHTH & BLHFHG

Loved using LHTH, LHFHG, BLHFHG, BHFHG, PHFHG, CTC, & RTR!

Post Reply