stalled

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hamilton5
Posts: 5
Joined: Wed Nov 13, 2013 9:32 am

stalled

Post by hamilton5 » Thu Dec 05, 2013 10:27 pm

We started HOD for the first time in August (using BHFHG and LHFHG) but when we started our co-op about 6 weeks into HOD, we stalled and I can't seem to pick it back up. My boys (4,6,9) have the idea that since our co-op is on winter break we are "out of school". My oldest is especially resistant to "school" and this doesn't help. I feel like I am back where we started 2 years ago and am so frustrated. For now we have been reading a lot, playing learning games and just living but I feel like I am not being forceful enough with school but just can't seem to "wrangle" them into sitting still long enough to have school time. Any suggestions on how I can try to get back on track?

psreit
Posts: 1034
Joined: Wed Feb 10, 2010 7:17 am
Location: Pennsyvania

Re: stalled

Post by psreit » Fri Dec 06, 2013 8:35 am

I have a dd who, almost every night, before I walk out of her room, will ask "School tomorrow?" I say to her, "Yes, Angie. You know we have school". I don't know if she asks just because she wants to know, or if it is in some way manipulative. Because sometimes she will just say when I leave her room, "No school tomorrow!" I just say, "Yeeeessss". She has had many struggles and frustrations in math and reading, so she is not excited about school. It definitely is better this year, but she would much rather just do 'fun' things during the day. She attends Patch the Pirate Club at our church each week. In the devotions in her club book this past month, she was learning about diligence. So, I have been stressing this character trait with her. She knows if I say there is school, she has to do the work. But, she will try to do it quickly, and sometimes it is not done well. If your dc are refusing to work, you need to 'nip it in the bud' and just let them know that school is still in session and they are expected to continue to do their daily work, even though co-op is out for now. Let them know how many days they need to work before their break. Maybe there could be some kind of incentive if they get their work done early. Sometimes I will give my dd grace and make her load a little lighter, but if I would just allow her NOT to do her school work just because she doesn't want to, I am letting her be in charge. I know HOD teaches many character traits, but I would be stressing obedience and diligence right now. Maybe you could get back into it by doing half-speed. Christmas is less than 3 weeks away, so maybe light days until then would help, since your children are young. This is an exciting time of year for children, but that does not give them liberty to go against what you say. Don't lose heart. Sorry if I come across strong, but I know how it would be here if I wasn't firm. Ask the Lord for wisdom. He'll show you what needs to be done. :)
I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth. III John 4
Pam
dh 33 yrs
ds29 church planter in MA
dd27 SAH mom
dd26
dd 12
3 dgs(5,2, & born 6/15) & 2 dgd(3 & born 2/15)

TrueGRIT
Posts: 355
Joined: Thu May 03, 2012 10:14 pm
Location: Kansas

Re: stalled

Post by TrueGRIT » Fri Dec 06, 2013 8:56 am

My oldest is especially resistant to school, and even my younger "go-getter" has a problem with working in December.
This year I took the initiative to plan only 2 weeks of school into the 3 weeks before Christmas. They have a choice of getting done early & having an extra week or having lighter days and going for 3.

My oldest (of course!) choose lighter days! He has been able to go to work w/ his dad some afternoons that way.
My go-getter is trying to get things done so he can have an extra week off.

I planned things this way because I was tired of the scenario which you described. It was awful for me.
Maybe you could evaluate what really has to be done and be firm to stick with it. Yet at the same time offer some incentives along the way. I know it is harder during this time of year. I can totally relate.
Relax, take a deep breath, & know that in the end it will all work out!

Have a blessed Christmas season!
Mikki
Ds 12- tutoring
Ds 9- Preparing
Dd 7 - Beyond and ER's
Ds 2- LHTH (sort of)

Daisy
Posts: 372
Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2009 7:47 pm
Location: SoCal

Re: stalled

Post by Daisy » Fri Dec 06, 2013 1:03 pm

I've got two thoughts.

1) Is the combination of co-op and HOD too much for your kids? What I love about HOD is the 4 day school week. If you are taking your 5th day and doing co-op all day, your kids are not getting much down time. So when co-op stops, it makes sense that they just want to be done.

2) December is a tough month. We all see the that Christmas vacation looming and it can't get here fast enough. I've always given my kids a "December Countdown" that lists on one page the work that needs to be completed by Christmas vacation. They cross it off, put stickers on it, whatever. It just creates an easy visual for them to see they are getting closer to vacation. That's always been that little push of motivation they need to get through the end. Now my kids will often put in MORE time just so they can start vacation early.
Wife of 18 years to Jon.
DragonFly (12yo)
Buttercup (14yo)

Tidbits of Learning
Posts: 303
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2011 9:18 am

Re: stalled

Post by Tidbits of Learning » Fri Dec 06, 2013 1:34 pm

The countdown works here at our house as well. I always make up a school calendar at the beginning of the year though. Like the ones they have for the school district but with our days on it. http://www.calendarlabs.com/calendars/s ... lendar.php The calendar goes in the front of my children's binders so they can easily see our school year at a glance. The month before Christmas break and the month of May...I print out a monthly calendar and circle our last day before break and our last day of school and make a huge production of marking the days off with a red X (by sharpie).
We have always done co-op as well but never had breaks that coincided totally with co-op. My kids see co-op as an extra-curricular not "school". We have made a big production of having a school name, school calendar, and the like and it has always helped my kids to separate co-op from "school". If your kids are younger, counting to the 100th day of school can be fun as well. There are many printables to celebrate 100 days.
What was your plan for starting Christmas break for your home school? Do you have a few weeks left? Your oldest should be able to have a heart to heart about school and responsibilities. I have been blunt with my kids in the past that home schooling is my job and I have to send in to the state saying we will school x amount of days and if we don't follow through that I will be in trouble. I tell them that I won't have done my job if we don't school. I have explained to them that just as the kids have to go to school and not miss too many days at the brick and mortar school so do we. Mine had been to public school (my olders) and understood absences and truancy. This conversation has been many moons ago for my older kids but I have told my youngest in words he will understand that it is my job to make sure he does school and it is his job to do his best every day.
It may sound very school-minded for home-schooling, but it has worked for us and it was not an issue once we had the calendar and made a huge production of marking off days. We normally plan something fun like pizza and a movie for our last day as well or something similar.
2020-2021
dd20, dd19 Grown and Flown :D
ds18-12th grade at hybrid school
ds14-8th grade MTMM President's Study and Science

mom23
Posts: 532
Joined: Thu Apr 08, 2010 10:10 am

Re: stalled

Post by mom23 » Sun Dec 08, 2013 9:23 pm

It does seem to be a hard time of year...at my house, I have to admit that it seems to be Mom that is most "off track" with the rhythm of our school day lately. :oops: And, that, of course, rubs off on the kids. I'm cutting myself a little slack for the time being-it's hard to stay on track with holidays thrown into the middle of things (that always involves travel for us, since all our family is out of state.) Then there's the sickness that has attacked our house with a vengence the past couple of weeks...sometimes life just calls out for a day off here and there, or a half day thrown in. I'm trying to be okay with what my life is demanding right now.

However, I know at the end of all this there will be the day that we have to buckle down and get back to business, and at that time the kids will probably be more reluctant than I am to dive in and get back into the swing of things. For me, the key at that point is establishing a fairly strict wake up time, and then a firm routine when they get out of bed...the key here being NO screens of any sort before school time-that means no one can sit and watch the news with Dad, or sneak in a game on the Leap Pad, and Mom cannot check email or facebook. I allow them enough time between waking up and starting school to get dressed, eat breakfast, and make their beds. Then we're down to business. It takes a few days where I really have to be firm with calling them back from the corners where they are trying to play with toys, or read fun books, or in general avoid Mom (because surely if Mom doesn't see me she'll forget about school, right?!) But a firm and strict start in the morning is definietly the key to getting our routine off on the right foot. However it needs to work at your house-whether the day starts with chores instead, just setting that routine before the school day makes it much easier to stick with it once school is "in session".
Becky, married to my preacher-man and raising:
DD 12-7th grade public school
DS 10-Preparing
DS 8-Beyond
DS 3-Just doin' his thing

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