Is there anything wrong with setting an alarm for my kids?

[lissiejo]

This isn't exactly an HOD related question, just a general homeschooling question. Here's our situation...

I had two unexpected surgeries since last Christmas. While I'm doing well and recovered, I'm struggling to get our year on track even now! We sort of got back on track after my Christmas surgery, but not to my liking and then my summer surgery just threw me completely off again even though we didn't start school until August. This is COMPLETELY not like me. We are usually fairly well scheduled and our past couple of years at full-time homeschooling (I'm not including the preschool years) have been very easy and laid back.

The complicating factor is I have 2 part-time jobs. I teach piano for 2 1/2 hours every afternoon and Junior High lit to homeschoolers every Monday. I don't have as much wiggle room as every other homeschooling family I know. I keep being told by well-meaning friends and family that I need to just let them sleep until they wake up, which is usually about 8. I don't need to be so scheduled. I can just let things go. But I really don't feel that way. I feel like things are falling apart at my feet and my oldest daughter is especially frustrated that we don't typically get through everything each day and we're still only going half speed!

We already have a morning and evening routine which works well which includes chores and responsibilities that they are very good at completing. It just seems the main problem at the moment is getting started soon enough so we can be done before I start my other responsibilities.

What I want to know is this: Do any of you have a set wake-up time in the morning for your kids that you follow pretty strictly? Does this work for your family?

[mom23]

I've set a wake up time for our family this year. We're not currently following it very strictly because of sickness that's being passed around our house, but I do plan to get back to it as soon as we beat the bug. Setting a wake up time teaches responsibility! And, as you said, it allows for life to happen after school time.

[8arrows]

There is nothing wrong with setting an alarm and having a schedule. There are a few "rules" in the homeschool circle that I don't get! If I let my children sleep until they woke up, some of them wouldn't be starting school until 11! And, if they knew I wasn't starting school until they got up, they would stay in bed faking sleep!

[John'smom]

My dc have an alarm clock. We actually set it 30 minutes earlier starting this week. I know everyone here is gracious, so I'll tell you that they get up @ 7 a.m. We are all much happier. The way I see it, I'm raising not children but adults that will one day need to go to work and if they are use to sleeping til 9 everyday, well, that's just no practical in the real world unless you work 2nd shift. My dh leaves the house by 6:45 and he has an office job. You have to do what works for you, not others (including me). I do make sure my kids are in bed by 9:30 too as I want them to have sufficient time to sleep for health. HTH!!!

[LynnH]

When my dd was still at home she had us get her up at 7:30 so that she could get going on school and get done at a reasonable time. Now that she is in college and has 8:30 classes she is glad she got in the habit of getting up early. My ds actually requests we get him up at 6:30, but that is because if he does that he gets to eat breakfast with his Dad. He is in bed by 9:30 each night. He starts school by 7:30 doing bible first which doesn't require me as I am usually still eating my breakfast then. He likes this schedule because then he is done usually by 1:30 and that is doing MTMM. He then has the rest of the afternoon to run around outside doing his parkour/workout stuff.

[jenn in nc]

And, if they knew I wasn't starting school until they got up, they would stay in bed faking sleep!

haha! Yep! Mine would totally do that too!

We do alarms here too. I really don't think we'd ever get finished in a reasonable time frame otherwise. Our older kids get up at 6:45 and our younger kids at 8:00. My kids are MUCH less frustrated now that we do this. So am I

Jenn

[MomtoJGJE]

If that's what works for your family then there is nothing wrong with it!

But I'm jealous that your kids sleep late enough to need an alarm

And I'm totally the parent who would pretend I thought my kids were asleep if they would lay in bed quietly faking sleep

[creekmama]

My 6yo wakes up early on her own. My 9yo sets his alarm for 7 AM probably because he just likes his cool alarm clock. :lol

But more importantly, just do whatever works for your family. It doesn't matter what the other homeschoolers you know are doing. Our families are all so different. That's one of the joys of homeschooling, isn't it? Getting to do what works best for our family!

[StephanieU]

If that's what works for your family then there is nothing wrong with it!

But I'm jealous that your kids sleep late enough to need an alarm

And I'm totally the parent who would pretend I thought my kids were asleep if they would lay in bed quietly faking sleep

I am glad we are not alone. My kids get me up before 7 each day. I am happy when they don't wake me before 6:30, even though the oldest is normally up by 6. Some times they are even up before their dad leaves for work (5:45). No need for an alarm clock yet - that is for sure!

[abrightmom]

My older boys have to set their alarm for 6:30 and their Dad wants them "ready to start the day" by 6:50. I am struggling a bit with my wake up time (5:50 a.m.) so we are not as "on task" in the mornings as would be ideal. But, we ARE striving to make small changes each week. I cannot IMAGINE not requiring my sons to get up to their alarm clock. The days go horribly if they sleep until they want to and I believe it sets an unrealistic expectation for their future. I have one child who is prone to laziness and the alarm is quite good for him.

[lissiejo]

Thank you so much ladies This is how I've felt, but just needed to hear (or read!) that it was okay.

The funny thing is that up until this year they would all be up at 6:00 or 6:30 easy. I used to envy all the moms who talked about their kids sleeping in, but when it happened to me it totally threw me off. I don't know what happened this year!

[MelInKansas]

I think it's fine. I have struggled with this too. My oldest ones sleeping in is a new development. The problem here is, yes we do have other things we would like to do in the afternoons, and I have decided that when I wake my oldest up SHE is more grumpy and frustrated and when I don't and school doesn't start until 9:30 then I am more grumpy and frustrated. But if I had other work to do and things that needed to be done in the afternoon, an alarm and getting up earlier would be a must. This is assuming that you can get them to bed on time each night. That has been a struggle for us, and that is part of the reason I feel bad about waking them up early sometimes.

I need to work on my own schedule too. When I go to bed early and get up early I do so much better in all areas. My own time in the Word, prayer, everything is so much better!

[my3sons]

Everyone here must be up by 7:30 AM. If they are not up, they are woken. We then have a very loud start to our day together, doing chores and putting on praise music. My olders have chosen to set their own alarms and get up at different times (6 AM for my teenager, and 6:30 AM for my middle aged ds). This has been their choice. I did make the rule that my oldest could not get up prior to 6 AM. I also made the rule that if up before 7:30AM, dc should quietly do work in their bedrooms until 7:30 AM. We do let our oldest ds get up and see dh in kitchen and do a few things there before 7:30 AM, so I guess it's only a rule for the youngers now. I think alarm clocks are fine to set within reason. They do help with routine and teach responsibility. I hope you are recovering from your surgeries, lissiejo. I am sorry you had to go through those. I know I have taken longer to recover from surgeries than I thought I would. You are such a hardworking, diligent, loving mom - I know from having gotten to know you here on the board. Just give yourself needed rest, time, and some well-deserved grace!!! Please do take care of your health first and foremost. Your dc will be just fine with an alarm.

Love in Christ,
Julie

[lissiejo]

Thank you so much Julie Those words blessed my heart and I needed to hear them so desperately today! My husband has been really good at forcing me to rest, but I just have such a hard time extending myself grace. I tell others to do it all the time and I certainly mean it, I just forget it for myself. I needed to have it said to me. Thank you

[Nealewill]

I agree with everyone - you gotta do what you gotta do and make it work for your family. I originally did wake my kids up for the first couple of years homeschooling. But we are now to a point where I need the schedule and so do they if there is any hope of getting finished in a timely fashion. Praying for you though.