What to do if your kids want to be in on all the fun!?

[NicoleJ]

So, I am about to organise my schedule for 2012. I am doing Preparing and Beyond and LHTH. I just know that my kids are going to want to do each other's experiments, listen to their stories, do their art activities, etc. How do you deal with this at your house? Do you tell your kids that no, they need to do their own fun activities and leave the fun of the other program for their sibling? Or do you somehow schedule it all in so they can each do the fun things that the other is doing too? Do you have them all on separate schedules/programs as per normal and then just tap them on the shoulder and interupt their work for 5 mins while you do something fun from the other program that you know that child would like to join in with? The problem I see with that is that there is so much fun in all of the guides that they will all be doing the fun activities in all three of the guides every day and it is going to destroy the flow and timing of our day. Does any of this make sense? What do you do at your house? TIA!

[sharonb]

We are also doing Preparing, Beyond, and LHTH! Just the other day I created a very detailed schedule, but once again I quickly realized that I am not a schedule person and it's just not going to work around here. We do have a routine that we try to follow, though. My older children are supposed to be working on something independent while I do LHTH with the youngers. But, sometimes they come into the living room and get involved in the fingerplay and music, and if there's an activity that requires any kind of jumping or running around, they definitely join in on that. And I decided I don't mind. They are having fun, and showing their younger siblings that school is fun. LHTH doesn't take that long anyway. When I am working on Beyond with my 1st grader, once again, the older 2 are supposed to be doing something independent. So far, that is working. If they ask to participate in an art activity, I will tell them they are welcome to AFTER they have finished all of their own work for the day. If they happen to come in to the living room and want to join in on jumping jacks and reciting a Bible verse, I don't really mind that. It only takes a couple of minutes, and gives the olders a quick break. Now, when it comes to Preparing, so far my youngers have shown no interest in any of that. But since the youngers finish up their school earlier than the olders, if the youngers want to watch/participate in parts of Preparing, I don't necessarily mind that either, as long as they aren't being disruptive. My big exception to that is the Bible study part of Preparing. I want to be able to have good discussions with my Preparing dc without being interrupted. But if my 1st grader sees my older 2 making shields for Preparing, and decides he wants to make one too, that's fine with me. He can work on it AFTER he is finished with his own work.

(I've decided to be pretty laid-back about things, and give the children checklists. So, that's why it works for them to sometimes observe/participate with other programs. I decided I don't like the stress of having to do everything in certain blocks of time. They know what they need to get done each day, and our days actually seem to go faster and more smoothly when I DON'T try to follow a certain schedule!)

Oh, and BTW, I'm reading Beyond's storytime during lunch so that everyone can hear it.

[mamas4bugs]

Everyone around here is always in everyone else's business.

It's a bit easier for me to allow this, as mine are further apart in age and, therefore, guide. In theory, the boys are supposed to be doing independent work whenever I'm working with another child on a project or reading aloud. In practice, I open a book to read, and children magically appear next to me. Ds 13 understands that that's fine, but it comes out of his free time later, as it makes his school day a bit longer. Ds 9 has much shorter days than his brother, so he doesn't mind at all that it stretches his day a bit to be involved in a project or experiment. I figure that it will be several years before ds in Bigger hits the RTR guide, so the projects and such will still be fresh for him when he gets to that guide.

Everyone is always in the middle of whatever the youngest is doing, but her stuff is generally short, so it doesn't add too much time.

I figure they are building bonds and memories this way, so it works for us.

[MelInKansas]

I'm very interested to see what others have to say, since next year I will probably be doing 3 guides (Finishing Beyond, LHFHG, and LHTH, my oldest will probably move into Bigger after 10 weeks). I KNOW they will all be distracted and want to do what the other ones are doing, especially my oldest. And I feel like with her, if she gets distracted it will make the school day a lot longer. I like the idea that you can let them join if their own work is done, that could be very motivating. Both the oldest and 2nd will have seat work stuff so I may try to have them do that at the same time, which I do now. They do sometimes get distracted by what the other is doing, if I am helping one for example, but at least they are sitting down at the same time.

I remember when I did LHTH with my older 2, part of what made the fingerplay time so much fun was that they did it together. So I think it would be great if the older ones can do this along with my 2YO (who will be 3). I hope I can work out a schedule where some of this interaction is encouraged - without it making our school days last too long. Then sometimes, it will be good if the youngest can have her own time and do her own thing, since she really thrives when she can do that.

[NicoleJ]

Thanks for your responses! I just know I am going to end up with three little girls who want to be doing their own school work, PLUS the art and experiments from the others guides. I like the idea of saying, "Yes, you can make a _____ like your sister is now.... after you have finished you OWN school work!". That would probably work fine. And it is also true that if they join in for short 5 minute activities (especially the LHTH activities) then that is not really a big deal. I just don't want our school day to drag on, or for the Beyond student to not finish her Beyond work for the day because she was so busy trying to do what the LHTH student or the Preparing student was doing!
I'm glad others are finding the same issue at their house!
I did have a chat today with my girls about how next year they will all be on different programs (2012 is our first HOD year), how each program is fun and will have exciting activities in it, and how sometimes they will look at what the other sister is doing and think, "Oh, I wish I was doing that!". I really laid it out that they might feel a bit put out if they are doing something like maths and they see their sister doing art. But, I said that they have to, 'Be content with such things as they have..." and will need to remember that they also have fun things to do that their other sisters might not be doing. So, hopefully with me talking to them about it now, and stressing the importance of them being happy with the work and the fun that they get to do themselves in their own program, we won't have so many issues with girls complaining because they wish they could do such-and-such instead of the grammar lesson! (And maybe grammar will get done quickly if they know that they can join in with the other activity once grammar is completed!)

[my3sons]

HOD is so much fun, that everyone does want to do it all! However, it is not so fun when the school day goes way too long because of it, or when older dc constantly upstage younger dc because they're just better at most things. Maintaining that balance is important. I don't mind the "5 minute fun", and certain things lend themselves well to that. For example, if someone bakes something for a history project, everyone gets to eat it and compliment the cook. Or if it's someone's turn to share a poem with someone, we can all take 5 minutes to sit on the couch, listen to the reader, and clap at the end. However, no one else takes a turn at the microphone then, as it was that child's turn to shine. Or if the little guy's guide called for a re-enactment of the Red Sea parting and the Israelites crossing, etc., then I can quickly assign everyone a part, give them 2 minutes to throw on some type of costume, and we can take 5 minutes to act it out. However, if something takes more than 5 minutes, or if it is clearly an assignment for just that child to enjoy doing on their level and enjoy sharing as their special thing, then we go solo. So, overall, most of the day each child is enjoying their own guide and joining in only now and then for a 5 minute thing that gears itself toward celebrating together with the others. Everyone loves showing off their things to each other around lunch time, and I love that they each did their own thing they were able to do well. For example, even though my olders would have enjoyed doing my little guy's LHFHG's art project, it is far better that just my little guy did it because then he gets to show his project off to his older brothers without thinking his work was "less" because they'd stopped and done his LHFHG project too. Likewise, there is just a lot more interest there as they share with one another, as they didn't all do each other's things. Having dc do the things in their own guides separately keeps their things special, and it cuts down on the comparing. And, we all like having finished on time so we have time for things other than school the rest of the day.

Here are a few pics of 5 minute fun things we've done together...
LHTH activity of making music and marching to it...


LHTH activity of flying...


LHTH Bible activity re-enacting The Last Supper...


LHTH Bible story re-enacted...


Bigger Hearts testing of the planes lift, drag, etc....


Bigger Hearts Gold Rush...


Bigger Hearts, sinking the Philadelphia (only Riley built the boat, and Wyatt only helped with the "bombing" )...


Drawn into the Heart of Reading re-enactment of battle for kickoff...


Bigger Hearts re-enactment of history story...


Bigger Hearts science, find the camouflaged bug...


RTR, playing history game made from history project...


RTR, eating history project as Wyatt reads about the history event from notebook (but only Wyatt did the baking)...


RTR, going on the Crusades, Wyatt set it all up, and the rest of the dc joined in only on the activity part, Wyatt directed it all...


Poetry Reading...


I think it is important to know at what point in an activity to have everyone join in. Usually, we try to join in at the culmination of something. For example, if it is a cooking project, the one child whose guide the project is in is responsible for the cooking, and the other dc are not involved at that point. However, when it is time to eat the treat, everyone is part of that. If it is a science project, the child whose guide the experiment is in sets it all up, and maybe will demonstrate the outcome quickly for the rest, and the rest are observers or assistants. If it is a poetry reading or sharing orally type of project, only the child who is to share does so, and the role of everyone else is to be the encouraging audience (i.e. the rest of the dc don't then jump up and read poems too, as it was the other child's turn to "shine"). If it was a re-enactment, the child whose guide it is in leads that, and gets first pick at which role to play, and the rest of the dc are the subordinates.

In this way, dc do separate guides and are getting the most out of their learning, while still having learning moments together. I wanted to post pictures of this and try to explain it as I've had people ask me how my dc are learning together if they are in separate guides. They are doing things together, but not all doing each other's guides, as that would be too much to do in a day, and yet they are sharing through 5 minute fun type activities, and then at meal times as they proudly show their work to one another and hang it on the fridge or set it on the counter to tell dad about when he gets home. This is just one way of sharing, of course, and not everyone does it this way, but we've found each child really shines in his guide this way, and yet they are all enjoying hearing about and participating in bits and pieces of each other's learning as well. HTH as you decide how you'd like to approach this in your home, nicolej!

In Christ,
Julie

[NicoleJ]

Thank you so much, Julie, for your ideas and experience in this area! I had never really thought of the potential problem of the children comparing each other's work if they are doing activities altogether. That is a real possiblity with my crew here I really like your idea of combining when it is very short and won't detract from the main child's 'time to shine' and leaving that child to do the activity by themselves where it is going to be best to - using God's wisdom to know the difference!

Thanks again, your replies are always so detailed and on-the-mark,

Nicole